While the instruction booklet details multiple ways to use the Relationship Repair card deck, over time we have received messages and relationship advice from people who have found their own, unique ways of utilizing the deck which better fit their lives
With a Partner
“Each Sunday, my boyfriend and I pick one card from the deck and read it to each other. Then we each place the card we picked in a noticeable place in our own homes. During the week, we look for opportunities to practice that skill with each other and others in our life. This has been a big help for our relationship, as I feel like we are growing together.” – Abby C., Portland, OR
“We have sorted the deck into three smaller decks. 1) The dialogue card deck (speaking/listening in the moment skills) we use when we are having a conflict. 2) The self-reflection cards we use before or after a tough conversation or when the other person isn’t available. 3) The “deeper” cards (tools and activities that take more time) we use only when we have more time, usually not during a conflict.” – Bradley J, Seattle, WA
“There’s only a few times we’ve used them for repair, we’ve more regularly used them to appreciate qualities of our relationship. The artwork alone is a tool for this.” – Adrianna F., St. Louis, MO
Used with Counseling Clients
”While I see the value of all the cards, I picked my favorite 20 which I regularly use with clients. I use them once in a while when working with a couple together, which your art therapy activities article was helpful for. But mostly I use them when I speak with them separately; it’s a great for the client that is waiting while I work with their partner. I always ask them to pick one tool they think would help, tell me what they picked, and sometimes practice with them.” – Mikaela S.
Used by Self
“I just leave the deck open on a shelf in the bathroom. When I sit down to do my business, I pick a card to study. Learning tools while leaving stools! It also has the benefit of making my toilet time more relaxed.” – Bridgit K, Toronto, ON, Canada
“There have been a few times my wife and I pulled them out when hosting other friends for dinner. We take turns picking and reading a card allowed, then each of us thinks of a situation that would have been helpful for. Even though it’s after the fact, it does seem like I’m learning some of the skills for when similar situations arise.” – Ben A., Raleigh, NC
Thank you to our customer community for sharing these ideas, and expanding how we might utilize the deck. I’m not sure there’s anything I love more than learning together, from each other. If you are reading this and have also figured out new ways to use the Relationship Repair game, send it in to us and I will add it to this post.
Stuart Watson, Author
Relationship Repair Game